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1) "Don't send me home. I mean it. I can do much better than this."
As soon as Elia said that, I wanted her to go home with the fire of a thousand suns. Are you kidding me? I--first, why is anyone mouthing off to the judges (including Chef Tom, who I have a ridiculous and stupid love for), and second, WHEN HAS THAT EVER WORKED? Like, in the history of TV? "Why yes, contestant who just mouthed off to us, we will listen to your sage advice." NO. They will send your ass home. And they did just that. They also, however, could have sent home--
2) FABIO. Dude, what the hell? Are you mouthing off to Anthony Bourdain? He will MAKE YOU EAT YOUR OWN FACE. He is crazy! Also, for real, just--I can certainly understand defending your dish or trying to explain what you were going for, but I just watched a guy call out ANTHONY BOURDAIN and, like, challenge him to a fight by the bike racks after school. WHAT.
3) It is weirdly reassuring that even seven years later, Stephen is a great presentation guy but not the best chef. Tiffani called them original gangsters! HOW MUCH DO I WANT THE FINALE JUDGES TO BE ALL SEVEN WINNERS, OMG.
4) Richard, you went over the time limit. Quit making the bitchface and pay attention when you're playing next time.
Top Chef: All-Stars. Already, like, four times better than last season.
As soon as Elia said that, I wanted her to go home with the fire of a thousand suns. Are you kidding me? I--first, why is anyone mouthing off to the judges (including Chef Tom, who I have a ridiculous and stupid love for), and second, WHEN HAS THAT EVER WORKED? Like, in the history of TV? "Why yes, contestant who just mouthed off to us, we will listen to your sage advice." NO. They will send your ass home. And they did just that. They also, however, could have sent home--
2) FABIO. Dude, what the hell? Are you mouthing off to Anthony Bourdain? He will MAKE YOU EAT YOUR OWN FACE. He is crazy! Also, for real, just--I can certainly understand defending your dish or trying to explain what you were going for, but I just watched a guy call out ANTHONY BOURDAIN and, like, challenge him to a fight by the bike racks after school. WHAT.
3) It is weirdly reassuring that even seven years later, Stephen is a great presentation guy but not the best chef. Tiffani called them original gangsters! HOW MUCH DO I WANT THE FINALE JUDGES TO BE ALL SEVEN WINNERS, OMG.
4) Richard, you went over the time limit. Quit making the bitchface and pay attention when you're playing next time.
Top Chef: All-Stars. Already, like, four times better than last season.
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