So this week, the writers just went, "Fuck it, small town AU?" "Small town AU it is!" AND IT IS KIND OF GREAT.

UnTroubled!Haven is...a lot like Amity in Jaws, actually, before Bruce the Shark shows up. Like, down to the signage. It's kind of impressive. Vince is dressed like he's in Panic! at the Disco and Dave looks like Dan Bucatinsky on Scandal. Duke is Detective Crocker! Simon's the (unseen) Chief! (Roy being a cop is both great and really, really sad. I love Roy, he's my second-favorite Crocker.) Nathan is Dr. Hansen! Which makes me wonder what the hell Max would've been like without the Troubles, or if maybe in *this* reality Max Hansen was played by Nicholas Campbell.

Also, Dr. Hansen is an enormous dork - "I wonder what 'Nother' means." "...I think it means 'not her'." GENIUS - who clearly also goes bugfuck crazy when someone he loves is threatened, which--well, now we know that's nature, rather than nurture. I don't know that I can ever watch Eureka again without thinking, "ALL OF YOU RUN, THAT GUY IS LIKE JARETH FROM LABYRINTH ONLY MORE EVIL"; C. Ferg is killing it over here. I don't know that I want him on past this year - hahahahahahaha no, we need to put William in something like a barn IMMEDIATELY - but he is great.

Oh, and hey, guess what? Whatever we do to William happens to Audrey, too NATHAN STOP SHOOTING PEOPLE JESUS CHRIST.

I defy you to find me something cuter than Audrey waking up in a tank top and PJ pants, walking down the road, bitching that a Trouble stole her car *and* her shoes. "What kind of Trouble steals my shoes?" With, again, the quintessential Haven reaction to the Troubles: resigned sighing. I LOVE THIS SHOW SO MUCH.

Duke, come on, you have like nine hundred guns. (EVERYONE IN TOWN DOES.) Surely you have a bigger one somewhere on the Rouge.

Next week: Danny Masterson! Kris Lemche with the worst mustache I have ever seen. THE HORRORS OF BLOGGING. And normally I would say that sarcastically, but: Haven.
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