See? Wait a week, shit goes down. Again.

1) Katherine fucking with Stefan’s dream = hey, remember when Damon used to do that? Me too.

2) “You have to admit, I am getting better at this.” Yes! And that’s the worrying part!

3) “I told Ric to tell Jenna—“ So yeah, he and Ric hang out. Sure, it’s mostly to investigate werewolves (while Alaric hears stories about Jenna’s sordid, awesome past), but still!

Also, he brought cobbler. Sure, he’s murderous and unstable, but he understands manners

4) I don’t know why, but something about werewolves being mostly extinct is extremely depressing, to me.

5) I really hate to say this, you guys, but Stefan’s Damon/Elena dream? Kinda worked for me. I KNOW. Apparently, when you give him what he wants, Damon is not a bad boyfriend.

6) George Lockwood came from a long line of werewolves; Katherine used him to convince the town to kill all the vampires in her “family”. (“They were your friends and family, and you sold them out?” “Without blinking.”) He helped arrange her escape before Emily sealed the tomb, which may or may not have been a backup plan. Katherine – who was pissed Damon “interfered”, though what the fuck, princess, SO DID STEFAN – fled Mystic Falls after paying George off with a moonstone, which Tyler has and Mason desperately wants.

None of this tells me who sold Emily out, though I’d bet it was Katherine leaving information with George. Also, for real, everyone back then was running game on each other. Except, possibly, the Forbes family. And maybe the Fells.

7) guys, I would totally watch an 1864 spinoff of this show. I’m not even kidding. It's like the Pimped Out Dress version of a CW show. With VAMPIRES.

8) CHARADES. YOU GUYS, THEY PLAYED CHARADES. WHILE DRUNK. This means my dream of one day seeing Damon and Alaric do drunken karaoke is still alive.

9) Stefan: kisses Katherine, stabs her in the spine, locks her in the basement, and tortures her with vervain. Because Stefan Salvatore 2010-2011 is <3 THAN YOU. (To be fair, he’s not at Emily’s level yet.)

10) The vervain torture would have worked a lot better if Katherine hadn’t been dosing herself with it for 145 years like a goddamn ninja, making herself immune. Fucking evil people, being smart.

11) Mason: I’ve heard great things about you.
Damon: Really? That’s weird, ‘cause I’m a dick.

I wish I knew how to make that my ringtone.

12) OKAY. Here is my main problem with the Katherine thing:

Katherine says she loves Stefan. From what we see from her POV, I don’t actually doubt this; she looked poleaxed in 1864, which is cute on her. Damon seemed to irritate her more than anything else. So the question isn’t “why did you fuck Damon?”, because – look at him. That is why. The question is, “why did you give him blood so he would turn?” What, were orgasms from one Salvatore not enough? Did he go downtown longer? WHAT? This is actually starting to bug me.

(Also, every time she gets all dismissive of Damon, the urge for someone to slap her into next week gets stronger and stronger. 1864 Damon was intense and passionate and had ideals and was pretty awesome; 2010 Damon is hurt and unstable and six kinds of dick. The fact that she strung along the good one - lady, seriously, you need to die very badly.)

13) Katherine was running from something in her past. DEAR GOD PLEASE LET IT BE KLAUS.

14) There is, however, something to be said for a woman with the stones to sell out 26 members of her own species to save her own pert little ass.

15) My God, Stefan was a dork back in the day, wasn’t he? And Damon just needed a hug. They...are noticeably not the same people anymore, which is as depressing as the werewolf thing.

16) Mason wanted everything to be cool! He just wanted to plant some peace trees! But nooooooooo, Damon had to come along and stab him with silver – and hey, fun fact, that doesn’t even work - and now they’re enemies.

17) “Damon and I died for nothing! Nothing!” “No, Stefan. You died for love.” OH MY GOD, EVERYONE QUIT SAYING THAT’S NOBLE AND POETIC. I mean, yeah, in the literary sense, but you know what works better? NOT BEING DEAD.

18) CAROLINE. Oh my God, here we go.

First: as soon as Katherine was done with you, you could’ve gone to Stefan and told him, and then YOU WOULD NOT BE WORKING WITH THE PRINCESS OF DARKNESS.

Second: Yeah, she could kill you! She could kill you, OR YOUR MOTHER, at ANY GIVEN TIME. You give in to blackmail once, you have to KEEP GIVING IN TO IT.

Third: Elena, it’s Caroline! Caroline just broke up with Matt! WHY ARE WE LISTENING TO CAROLINE’S ADVICE ON LOVE? She has been a vampire for about six days! SHE IS NOT AN EXPERT. JESUS YOU PEOPLE.

19) –yes, they totally got me with the Elena-Stefan breaking up fakeout. Nice one, guys. (They also got Caroline, which was the entire point.) Also, way to read Caroline and know she was pulling something.

20) I will give Damon this: he would never, ever even pretend to break up with you to secure safe passage from a total nutbar. He would constantly be around, lighting strangers on fire to make sure they didn’t start any shit, but you would be a hundred percent murder attempt free. The man commits.

21) “Elena, I really am sorry.” I don’t doubt that, Caroline. But you’re working with a psycho and not telling anyone why you’re working with a psycho, so I sort of want someone to smack you upside the head. What did I say last week, people? PHONE TREE. They come in handy for exactly these moments.

22) In order to become a werewolf, you have to take a human life; the curse then kicks in. (The curse of the Aztec shamans, remember? No, that will never stop being funny.) (In the books, you have to deliberately drink someone else’s blood, vampire or human or whoever. The taste is what sets it off. The show is a much bigger fan of you choosing murder.)

23) Aaaaaand now the big question, mostly for Stefan: WHY THE HELL CAN’T HE KILL KATHERINE?

Seriously, why not? And you can’t go with “she’s immune to vervain” on this one, because Stefan had two separate attempts to do it, and both times he hesitated. He can’t keep doing that; one of these days, that’s gonna get someone killed. That’s just – you gotta man up, sir, and you have to do it fast, because your ex is crazy and will stop at nothing to get what she wants. Your words.

Next week: Mason dimes out the vampires in Mystic Falls. To Sheriff Forbes. Yeah, that’s gonna end great.
Anonymous( )Anonymous This account has disabled anonymous posting.
OpenID( )OpenID You can comment on this post while signed in with an account from many other sites, once you have confirmed your email address. Sign in using OpenID.
Account name:
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.


Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.


iphignia939: (Default)

Most Popular Tags

Powered by Dreamwidth Studios

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags